FALLOW, lying

Today I finished the last big chunk of work before I head off for Christmas vacation. There’s still plenty of follow-up – cleaning out of email, filing of papers, planning for January – mostly mundane tasks that will keep me dully busy for the rest of the week.

But for the first time in over four months, I feel like I have time to breathe. I can still see plenty of bumpy stretches ahead in 2011, but I expect that my immediate day-to-day work life will settle back into its familiar if slightly unsettling routine once I return after the holidays and have sorted through the new supply of email that is my daily destiny.

This gift of down time, coming at the commencement of a new year, turns my thoughts to the question of what happens next. I’ve never been the type to read the last page of the book first, but when it comes to my life, I’ve always wanted to jump ahead – to know how the chapter, if not the story, ends. But after 50-plus years on planet Earth, I finally understand that life unfolds at its own pace, in its own way. The route often shifts unexpectedly, but none of us can change our ultimate destination.

Life is a mystery: great and terrible, small and precious. Too often we focus solely on the goal and ignore the magic that awaits us on the journey. Arriving here again at year’s end, I could make my usual resolutions: get in shape, save money, write my book, entertain more often.

Instead, I think I might resolve to enjoy the wildflowers on the side of the road and be less concerned with harvesting a crop. What will grow in that field, I wonder, if whatever lies waiting deep in the soil is allowed to sprout on its own, undisturbed by the tiller and the seed, the hoe and the farmer? What would I harvest if I watched for miracles instead of trying to create them?

Advertisements

About Mindy

I am divorced, no kids, working full-time in corporate communications. There are never enough hours in my day, mostly because I insist on hygiene, food, exercise and clean dishes. Really, how do women with kids do it?!?
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to FALLOW, lying

  1. mmm61 says:

    The last paragraph is inspirational. Thanks.

  2. Mindy says:

    It’s far easier to write than it is to do. Inaction is rarely an option in our culture. To wit, my horoscope for today: “There will be a lull in the action, and it comes at the perfect moment. Now you can sit back and figure out just how to make the most of the recent turn of events. Strategize.”

    Damn.

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s