FAILINGS

In my dreams, I am a paragon of motherhood — the one with boundless love and patience whose perfect cupcakes and Halloween costumes are the envy of all.

Bow to me, oh little people, for I have succeeded where others have failed in raising children cheerfully, and correctly, while looking good. I really get it right.

Well, burst that bubble! As I try to juggle work, life, and family I often make mistakes. Some small, some big. And all noticed and expounded upon by my offspring.

Like a recent trip to the mall that ended upon arrival since I’d forgotten my wallet. (Insert huge, exaggerated sighs and rolled eyes here.)

Or the required money order for a school field trip that is late. (Did you forget again?!?)

And, the very worst case scenario, hearing details of a dark day long ago when I lost my patience … and slapped. (I STILL remember how that hurt, MOM! )

Well, it hurts me, too, to realize that no amount of cupcakes and carpooling in the succeeding years ever fully erases a bad decision’s sting. And all you can do is apologize and move imperfectly on.

I miss the unconditional Mommy love that in time morphs (temporarily, I hope) to stingy cheek pecks and criticism … from … “You are the very bestest person in the whole wide world,” to … “GOD, Mom! Why did you do that in front of my friends? … Are you really wearing …THAT? … Don’t start conversations. Please. Just don’t.”

Yeah, I’m not perfect. But neither are they. Just look at their rooms! No one gets it right all the time. So I can only hope that as life unfolds they realize that, too, and we all find ways to accept each other as we are, failings and all.

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About Michele

I am a freelance writer with three kids, two cats, and a dog with thyroid disease. I'm bouncing back from a divorce and making the most of every day. There is so much beauty around me. I am grateful!
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